It's been a challenging couple of weeks. Sleep has been intermittent at best. It's been a time of great growth, and with great growth...there is an increase in awareness. Usually this translates into several sleepless nights. This is of course a very precious gift. The growth. The awareness. This travels through bloodlines for generations upon generations. It is worth the effort. I know this all too well. I have always been alerted to the passing of those I have had a heart connection with (platonic, romantic or otherwise). It is not uncommon for those with extrasensory perception to be aware of something as simple as this. This last time it was quite different though. I was woken up 4 or 5 times between the hours of 1:30am and 5:21am with a panicky feeling. At least at the time, that is how my body registered the feeling as being...anxiety like. When I was poked awake (feels more like a "woosh") the first time, I peered into the darkness to see if there was someone there...this happens sometimes and I politely tell them to approach during waking hours. Only I did not see a silhouette, a ripple of energy, a notion that someone was standing bedside. I instead felt this feeling of panic that woke me up to darkness. I tried to fall back asleep, but succeeded only in laying there resting in a meditative like state. I initiated my Reiki and began a self-healing session while I rested hoping to drift off, only it never happened. When my alarm went off I was very aware of the feeling that something felt off. Something that was not of me but a part of me, even though I was fully aligned and centered. I mean, how could I not be after several hours of self-healing? I still wanted so badly to sleep but I couldn't. I had to go to work. I went about my day, drinking a token cup of coffee, despite the impending heartburn, to kick my butt awake in an effort to plow through until pajama time. It was as I sat in my pajama's later that evening, cuddled with my dog, that I received a text from an old friend. He told me that an old work colleague with whom I had been close to while working with that company, had passed that morning. I understood immediately what the night before was attempting to prepare me for. It was not a feeling of panic...but instead the feeling what this person felt pre-crossing. I have had a similar transmission like this before. It happened right before my maternal Grandmother passed. As I lay snuggled in my bed, the night before her surgery, I asked openly for her not to suffer. Should it be her time to leave us, as heart breaking as that would be, for her soul to feel free to return to glory with my full support. The idea of her having prolonged suffering made me feel sick inside. That night I was awakened by a feeling of someone crossing over my feet. I opened my eyes to this gentleman, standing on the opposite side of the bed. I couldn't speak. He was made of what seemed like a liquid amber. He was the most stunningly beautiful man that I have ever seen. His eyes bore into mine and I felt the word "no" as he very gently moved his head from side to side. I felt the deepest ache within my heart and it hurt so much. Just like that he was gone and I got up to get a glass of water and then promptly went back to sleep. My Grandmother died three days later at the young age of 67. I thought about this visitation for a very long time afterwards. The day my maternal Grandmother passed I was working. I could feel this energy beside me. Moving with me. Trying to get my attention. When my husband arrived out of the blue to pick me up and take me home...in my heart I already knew. With one look I knew. AND... I knew that she had been moving with me etherically that whole morning. It felt bizarre and she offered me a lot of communication in the days that followed. I did attempt to share with family but when grief takes hold, people get kind of stuck inside of themselves for a bit. Although I do hear spirit, I have found that my guides communicate in a different way. They do not use words. They communicate telepathically and with colour. They will awaken a feeling within my body, or show me images that help me to piece together their message to me. I know that I was prepared the night before my friends crossing this way. Just as I know the gentleman that appeared bedside before my maternal Grandmother passed, was in fact, one of my higher guides. It is a deeper knowing that you can feel in every cell of your body and it pulsates. It can be something challenging to explain to someone who does not experience it. For me personally, it helps to transition the grief into productivity. This greater knowing brings me peace. My preference is not to be woken up during the night, but this is when I am most relaxed and they have my full attention. Sooo...it is what it is, I guess. I do not get woken up nearly as often as I used to. I have had to set some boundaries. Some instances are worth being woken up for though. I have times during the day where I welcome the visitation and we have an established set of guidelines. Communication and boundaries are a healthy part of any relationship, after all! I am still in a state of learning to understand the full scope of the mediumship and channeling that I can do. I attended a healing workshop recently and I have been reminded again that it is time. In fact it is already progressing nicely...as in the train is leaving the station and I am choo-chooing along whether I like it or not. It's a good thing that I like it. It's my normal. It's just time to understand the depth of the conversation and what I can do with this. All I know for certain is that this is something that I will be devoting a lot of time to understanding. It's not something that will ever go away. It's a skill that must be continuously developed And, because this travels in bloodlines, I'm not just doing this development work for myself. I am also doing it for those that come after me in lineage. But that's a story for another time... Carrie Carter -Painted Chakras and Stairways (Located in Hull/Aylmer, QC area) Usui Shiki Ryoho Master/Teacher Lightarian™ Reiki Master/Teacher Crystal & Mineral Master/Teacher Soul / Healing Coach Affiliate Member of The International Center for Reiki Training Member of The Wellness Universe
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The truth about healing is that it can be messy. Making space for yourself to go through the unraveling of hard pain to get to the root cause, that pesky soft pain, can be a long process. Soft pain is the beginning. The beginning could have been a single event, or a series of events...there are many reasons for soft pain. This is the initial hurt. A death. A physical/emotional/spiritual altercation. An illness. Even job loss. Soft pain is the result of anything that upsets your energy and your alignment in a large enough capacity that it leaves a scar, so to speak. So what exactly is hard pain? Hard pain is the result of not processing something that ends up becoming what I call, an icky-sticky. It's both icky and sticky...because it's awful and it just won't go away. Over time this soft pain hardens and develops many layers....layer upon layer of unresolved pain. This initial pain, webs into a different pain and then into another. So what happens when we do not deal with our "stuffs"? Simple. They stick. We are meant to feel, process, embrace the truth and lesson and then finally, to release. If you have decided to embark upon a healing journey, to unravel and to free yourself, then I applaud you. It is not for the faint of heart. It requires grit and endurance...and I know that even if you do not feel like you have grit and endurance at times, please allow me to remind you that you most certainly do. We all have the capacity to self heal and to affirm and to maintain our own energy. The truth about healing is that it is not all rainbows and unicorns. Although wouldn't it be great if it were?! Healing is about peeling back each layer and being grateful for what each layer has taught you. Lessons are gifts. However, not every lesson is served with kid gloves. And, not every lesson is meant to feel all warm and fuzzy. Some of them trip you and knock you down and steal your breath from you. The truth about healing is that we are here to feel. That is the human experience. AND...you must feel it to heal it. We are all here to feel different things. That's the experience of the earthly body. While it is important to feel it while healing it...we are also not meant to stay in that moment. We must release. We must let go. That's the tricky part. Staying in our pain calluses us and does the disservice of robbing us of the present and so much more. That is why it is just as important to embrace the lesson. You have to feel it and release it, again and sometimes again...and it will become less and less...but the process is very important. No one can do this for you. You are ultimately in charge of your energy and what you retain and what you release. You are the sole ambassador of your energy. Try, as you move through a period of healing and run the gamut of emotions that is paired with a healing crisis (yes, it's actually called a healing crisis!), to be gentle with yourself. It's important to process and to release and to do what you can to raise your vibration. Anything that brings you joy so that you can be "in joy" is what you do to amp up your energy. Make space for yourself to heal. A bubble bath, a piece of chocolate in that bubble bath and maybe...your favorite music?! Heck, light a candle. Light several candles. Make yourself comfortable and then ask yourself...how can I make myself just a little more comfortable? Then do that. And then do a stitch more. Feel that joy. Feel that comfort. Feel that moment of being present and happy. You deserve to feel joy. It is not realistic to be a happy ball of sunshine everyday. We all move through "stuff". And...that's it. It's just stuff. You need to process it. You need to embrace it. You need to let it go. By doing so, you are making room for more. When we make room for more after making our path lighter, we attract like energy. We make room for better stuff, higher vibrational lessons will appear....and appear...and appear again. You will see that things will begin to shift. As we shift into a more authentic and realistic version of ourselves, we shift into a brighter reality. The Universe WILL give you exactly what you ask for. The trick is to authentically match the vibration of what you are asking for. You. Are. Worth. It. Carrie Carter -Painted Chakras and Stairways (Located in Hull/Aylmer, QC area) Usui Shiki Ryoho Master/Teacher Lightarian™ Reiki Master/Teacher Crystal & Mineral Master/Teacher Soul / Healing Coach Affiliate Member of The International Center for Reiki Training Member of The Wellness Universe |
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